Get the Car! Get the Car!
These are not typically words you hear coming from an Old Order Amish man. But I grabbed my keys and jumped into my car so fast I could have set a world speed record.
Actually , I happen to be really good at this because it is the fourth time someone has yelled this out to me. The other three times it was Bob when he let our dog Joey out of the house accidentally and Joey took off like something from Prison Break. But let’s get back to last Saturday.
So there I was over at Sadie’s house to take her out to lunch. I was a bit early and she wasn’t ready. I went into the house to wait as she finished her phone call out in the shed. (Yes, that is really where the Amish keep their phones.) I don’t think I was ever in her house all by myself and as I sat there near the warm coal stove (I am not making this up) all I could hear was the ticktock of the two clocks on the walls. Then I noticed that she had 4 calenders on the walls of the large open living room and kitchen. The whole ‘time is passing before me” motif got to me so I went next door to Sylvan’s house. Sylvan’s wife and small children were at home. The older boys were out in the barn. As we were chatting we noticed Sylvan pull up in his carriage. He was just coming back from the grocery store. I thought it was kind of neat but odd that Sylvan unhitched his horse and just left him there. Then the horse started to go to the barn. I said to Sadie (wife) “Now that’s a well trained horse, I suppose he will just put himself in the stall and take off his own harness too. Sadie laughed but then added “I have never seen him do that before. He better be careful that horse doesn’t run off”. And with that the horse looked at the open barn door straight ahead and promptly turned left and ran down the lane, reins and harness flapping. I ran outside and that is when I heard those all too familiar words “Get the Car, Get the Car! That’s me he’s calling out to, the only one with a car and keys. I get to be the horse chaser. I fumble for the keys in my coat pocket and make a dash for my car. One of the older boys was right behind me and jumped into the passenger seat. We flew out of that driveway. The horse was now running straight up the yellow line of the road. A tractor trailer had stopped up ahead and the oncoming car came to a screeching halt. The horse took a left turn up the next street avoiding the blockade. I was on his tail, literally. Elam is yelling “get up ahead of him, try to pass him”. Easy for you to say, person who does not drive cars. We were now on a residential street, cars were parked on both sides, and the street was narrow. The horse was not going to go onto the grass-he was a driving horse and used to pavement. He still had his blinders on and I thought if I got too close and spooked him he would just run into me. The conversation with Bob, my insurance man, would have gone like this. “You see, I was chasing this runaway horse and tried to pass him so we could lasso him and HE ran into me, HE RAN INTO ME. Am I covered?”
The horse is running as fast as he can, head high without a care or a carriage to slow him down, his eyes looking straight ahead at freedom and nothing else. However, about a half a mile up the road is a very busy intersection and his life would be flashing before his very eyes except for those blinders he was wearing. (Don’t we all run through life with blinders on on some point? Unaware of the danger that lies right around the next bend? Family and friends chasing us down trying to save us from own bad selves? Sorry, just a little philosophy lesson.) Back to the story! We had to catch him before he got into all that traffic. I gun the engine, we get neck and neck with him and a car starts to pull out of a driveway up ahead. I slam on the brakes, hit the door unlock button (damn I am good) and tell Elam “Grab him now”. He bolts from the car, runs as fast as he can, grabs on to leather and holds on. I think I saw smoke come out of his sneakers. It takes a minute but the horse slows down. I have to tell you, I was totally exhausted. Elam turns the horse around, I turn the car around and we meet up with Sylvan and Sylvan Jr. down at the end of the street. Sylvan is laughing and saying “boy that was a close one.” I wanted to say “I need a drink.” As we all got back to the farm Sylvan explained why he left the horse untied and the story goes like this. “Every time I come back from the store that little yellow cat is waiting for me. If I take the horse to the barn by the time I get back the yellow cat has gotten into the carriage and has started eating my bread. And today, as soon as I got out of the carriage, that yellow cat was under the carriage just waiting for me to leave. So I figured the horse would go into the barn and he was going in that direction, until Elam came down from the shed and clicked and the horse realized he didn’t have to go to the barn, he was actually free. Elam looks at his dad and says “are you saying it was my fault?”. “No” Sylvan said, “It was definitely my fault and if Ann hadn’t been here I would have been in really big trouble”. So the moral of this story is don’t lose your horse over a loaf of bread and always have your keys in your hand in case someone yells out “GET THE CAR!”
I got that drink later that evening. Nothing like a good bourbon and ginger ale after chasing down horses all day out on the range.
Faux Farm Girl
Annie